It is sheepish to admit, especially as I am normally a demure, diffident person – but nobody has ever accused me of being over-restrained at feasts, especially if fine food, lots of alcohol and good company are present. Needless to say, there are consequences, and in my case it often results in a hazy sense of bodily unease (which lasts for days), combined with a rock-solid bout of constipation.

Therefore I would not suggest anyone emulate this propensity for overindulgence – especially as I am not unaware of what is happening to the body in these situations. For example, there is increased risk of liver cirrhosis – and several million brain neurons were probably fried by the alcohol.